I have been doing a lot of thinking about the decisions parents have made or felt they had to make for the children with special needs. Some had tried desperate treatments in an effort to “fix” their child. There are just times we don’t know what to do. We search the Internet, read books and talk to experts. It can all be overwhelming and confusing.
We may think that the Bible doesn’t have any help in making these hard decisions. Actually the principles in the Bible fit to decision making. Here’s some examples:
We don’t have all wisdom and understanding especially in the beginning with our child. Things are changing all the time how can we possibly interpret our options and make wise decisions? James 1:5 (New Revised Standard Version) says that if we lack wisdom we can ask God. I don’t read that as praying “Lord give me wisdom” and then just waiting some magical knowledge of what’s prudent. We need to do our homework about options and treatment. By asking for wisdom we are asking for understanding that we lack on what to do.
I love Proverbs 3:5-6 (The New King James Version):
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.
How do we use that to apply in making decisions. I love the commentary on these verses from Bible Believer’s Commentary:
“3.5 First, there must be a full commitment of ourselves—spirit, soul, and body—to the Lord. We must trust Him not only for the salvation of our souls but also for the direction of our lives. It must be a commitment without reserve.”
“Next, there must be a healthy distrust of self, an acknowledgment that we do not know what is best for us, that we are not capable of guiding ourselves. Jeremiah expressed it pointedly: “O Lord, I know the way of man is not in himself; it is not in man who walks to direct his own steps” (Jer. 10:23).
“3:6 Finally, there must be an acknowledgment of the Lordship of Christ: “In all your ways acknowledge Him.” Every area of our lives must be turned over to His control. We must have no will of our own, only a single pure desire to know His will and to do it.
“If these conditions are met, the promise is that God shall direct our paths. He may do it through the Bible, through the advice of godly Christians, through the marvelous converging of circumstances, through the inward peace of the Spirit, or through a combination of these. But if we wait, He will make the guidance so clear that to refuse would be positive disobedience.”[1]
I have to admit that I worried a bit as I heard of some parents making some far out choices where the child died or mercy killings. However, I have come to see that relating to the Lord as above makes the decisions more clear.
There is great comfort in team parenting with our Father. I like to think of Him as Abba Father which makes Him Abba Grandfather as well. It helps so much to remember that He loves Billy Ray even more than I am capable of loving him and that He knows what I could not possibly know.
Until next time,
Peggy Lou Morgan
We may think that the Bible doesn’t have any help in making these hard decisions. Actually the principles in the Bible fit to decision making. Here’s some examples:
We don’t have all wisdom and understanding especially in the beginning with our child. Things are changing all the time how can we possibly interpret our options and make wise decisions? James 1:5 (New Revised Standard Version) says that if we lack wisdom we can ask God. I don’t read that as praying “Lord give me wisdom” and then just waiting some magical knowledge of what’s prudent. We need to do our homework about options and treatment. By asking for wisdom we are asking for understanding that we lack on what to do.
I love Proverbs 3:5-6 (The New King James Version):
Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.
How do we use that to apply in making decisions. I love the commentary on these verses from Bible Believer’s Commentary:
“3.5 First, there must be a full commitment of ourselves—spirit, soul, and body—to the Lord. We must trust Him not only for the salvation of our souls but also for the direction of our lives. It must be a commitment without reserve.”
“Next, there must be a healthy distrust of self, an acknowledgment that we do not know what is best for us, that we are not capable of guiding ourselves. Jeremiah expressed it pointedly: “O Lord, I know the way of man is not in himself; it is not in man who walks to direct his own steps” (Jer. 10:23).
“3:6 Finally, there must be an acknowledgment of the Lordship of Christ: “In all your ways acknowledge Him.” Every area of our lives must be turned over to His control. We must have no will of our own, only a single pure desire to know His will and to do it.
“If these conditions are met, the promise is that God shall direct our paths. He may do it through the Bible, through the advice of godly Christians, through the marvelous converging of circumstances, through the inward peace of the Spirit, or through a combination of these. But if we wait, He will make the guidance so clear that to refuse would be positive disobedience.”[1]
I have to admit that I worried a bit as I heard of some parents making some far out choices where the child died or mercy killings. However, I have come to see that relating to the Lord as above makes the decisions more clear.
There is great comfort in team parenting with our Father. I like to think of Him as Abba Father which makes Him Abba Grandfather as well. It helps so much to remember that He loves Billy Ray even more than I am capable of loving him and that He knows what I could not possibly know.
Until next time,
Peggy Lou Morgan
Blogs:
Amazon Author Connect, Parenting a Complex Special Needs Adult and Lighthouse Parents
Websites:
Parenting Your Complex Child and Lighthouse Parents
Club Mom Articles
Parenting Your Complex Child Yahoo Group
[1]MacDonald, W., & Farstad, A. 1997, c1995. Believer's Bible Commentary : Old and New Testaments . Thomas Nelson: Nashville